A couple years ago when I lost Jess, I decided to bury him so that I would never lose him. I dug this rose bush up, and I made a deep, deep hole. I placed Jesse’s body in the bottom of the hole with a sprig of catnip, one of his toys, and an opened can of shredded Tuna & Sardines. I then replaced about a foot of soil, sprinkling it gently on top of him. Finally I replanted this rose bush.
Every single time I pick these roses…each time I bring them into my bedroom -their invisible wisps of rosy scent curling in the air- I can feel Jesse’s presence. He’s somehow there with me -changed, but still there. I keep these roses in my bedroom all summer long. They’re like a secret or something.
Today I picked the 2 roses above and I thought it was strange how different they look. The one on the left looks like a rose. The one on the left looks like a . . . cabbage? ha!!
I wonder if we ever get over the loss of our loved ones. I think maybe not.
Anyhow…I’m looking forward to time at the coast. I’m bringing my camera, a bunch of film, and think I’ll also bring my paints along. No computer.